I've been reading a friend's blog about her path from Christian Fundamentalism to atheism. I don't agree with her on the assumption that there is no god or deity of any kind, but I don't think that her life is worse without such belief or better with it.
I've tried on several occasions to articulate exactly what it is that I believe and why. I think this might be a good time to take a look again.
I believe in the existence of deity. A being, a mind that is greater than our own. I cannot tell you which is older. Perhaps we invented it, a product of the collective consciousness of millions of people over thousands of years. The sheer power of the human mind, reinforced and collected over millenia. Or perhaps we come from it, a creator that brought us into being, to add to itself, or to not be alone.
I believe in the existence of this deity because I've encountered it. I don't expect that anyone else should take this as evidence. I could have been delusional. I don't think I was. It was a deeply personal experience with something more, something greater than myself.
The hard part about defining such a being, something that exists outside of our perceived reality, is language is almost exclusively used to define concrete existence. To define something is to place a limit on it. If something is good, it cannot be evil. If it is male, it cannot be female. If it is omnipotent, it cannot be weak.
I'm inclined to think that Deity is neither good nor evil. I think it is a source of life and energy, and it is a driving force to our existence. We learn and grow, and that existence feeds the Divine, in turn empowering us. A symbiosis. The gods do not show favoritism to one being over another. However, as a part of the Divine's existence, we have the capacity to tap into that energy and make changes in the world.
I don't think you'll meet the Divine in some book, or by some special technique. Each must find their own path, and some will not need the gods to do it. I doubt that anything as powerful as a god could be so insecure as to demand that everyone worship it, or so petty as to punish people for not believing in the absence of evidence to the contrary. If it were, then it could only be a creation of mortals, rather than the other way around, needing to take its power from the worship of its followers. That isn't symbiosis, but more of a parasitic relationship.
When I engage in worship of the Divine, I use symbols to focus myself. The Sun, the Moon, The Earth, the Elements, The Goddess and the God.
Could I be wrong? Could I be delusional? Absolutely. But I really don't think it matters. It gives me comfort to think that there's something out there, something greater than myself. I'm not denying facts, I'm just acknowledging the limitations of my knowledge. I don't know for certain, so what difference does it make?
Monday, April 8, 2013
Saturday, April 6, 2013
I Don't Believe in Homosexuality.
You'll be surprised where this is going. Pay attention.
A few years ago, I was talking to my sister and she informed me that her daughter, my niece, was bisexual (and for the record, still is). I'd come a long way since my years under cult influence. Before, I'd been unsure of how to feel about homosexuals and their lifestyle. By the point of this conversation, I knew there was nothing wrong with my niece and was glad that she could accept herself.
I'd recently taken a class on human sexuality and the discussion triggered a series of thoughts in my mind. How do you classify a woman who believes she is actually a man and is attracted to women? Is she gay for having a vagina and being attracted to women, or straight for believing she should have a penis and having the same attraction? If she undergoes surgery and now has a penis and is still attracted to women? We could run through the same questions for a man who believes he's a woman. What if a person believes they are androgynous and is attracted to one gender or the other? What if they're only attracted to other androgynous people? Hermaphrodites? What if a person has no sexual drive or desire whatsoever? Or a person who can only find sexual release through self stimulation?
Consider a woman who is in a relationship with a female to male transgender? Is she gay or straight? If the one she's with is male to female? What about a pre-female to male transgender living with a post op male to female?
How do you categorize a person who interest in their own gender is only a phase in their development? or perhaps their interest in the opposite gender is only passing? Perhaps sex itself is only a passing phase? or perhaps their art and thus the center of their self-expression?
Even along the limited perspective of 2 genders, the terms Homosexual, Heterosexual, and Bisexual fall quite short of adequate. Take for instance three men who categorize themselves as Bisexual. One may have a strong preference for men, another for women, and the third may like both equally. One could then consider that the one with a preference for men may have a higher overall libido, that he may take on more partners in a shorter period of time, or may have sex more often with just one or two partners, while the others get by with having sex less often or with fewer overall people.
So, no, I don't believe in homosexuality. Or heterosexuality. or bisexuality. Human beings just aren't that simplistic. So go, satisfy your wants, urges and needs in whatever way seems best to you, with whomever you find attractive. Stop worrying about categorizing yourself.
A few years ago, I was talking to my sister and she informed me that her daughter, my niece, was bisexual (and for the record, still is). I'd come a long way since my years under cult influence. Before, I'd been unsure of how to feel about homosexuals and their lifestyle. By the point of this conversation, I knew there was nothing wrong with my niece and was glad that she could accept herself.
I'd recently taken a class on human sexuality and the discussion triggered a series of thoughts in my mind. How do you classify a woman who believes she is actually a man and is attracted to women? Is she gay for having a vagina and being attracted to women, or straight for believing she should have a penis and having the same attraction? If she undergoes surgery and now has a penis and is still attracted to women? We could run through the same questions for a man who believes he's a woman. What if a person believes they are androgynous and is attracted to one gender or the other? What if they're only attracted to other androgynous people? Hermaphrodites? What if a person has no sexual drive or desire whatsoever? Or a person who can only find sexual release through self stimulation?
Consider a woman who is in a relationship with a female to male transgender? Is she gay or straight? If the one she's with is male to female? What about a pre-female to male transgender living with a post op male to female?
How do you categorize a person who interest in their own gender is only a phase in their development? or perhaps their interest in the opposite gender is only passing? Perhaps sex itself is only a passing phase? or perhaps their art and thus the center of their self-expression?
Even along the limited perspective of 2 genders, the terms Homosexual, Heterosexual, and Bisexual fall quite short of adequate. Take for instance three men who categorize themselves as Bisexual. One may have a strong preference for men, another for women, and the third may like both equally. One could then consider that the one with a preference for men may have a higher overall libido, that he may take on more partners in a shorter period of time, or may have sex more often with just one or two partners, while the others get by with having sex less often or with fewer overall people.
So, no, I don't believe in homosexuality. Or heterosexuality. or bisexuality. Human beings just aren't that simplistic. So go, satisfy your wants, urges and needs in whatever way seems best to you, with whomever you find attractive. Stop worrying about categorizing yourself.
Friday, March 8, 2013
Guns Under Fire
I've recently had a few discussions on the topic of Gun Control. There is a particular argument that control opponents use time and again, and frankly it doesn't actually help their cause. I am writing this blog entry specifically to address that argument.
We've all seen it and heard it. It comes in so many different forms and ways, but it really boils down to the same argument. It is the idea that guns don't need special laws to address their use simply because anything can be made into a weapon. There is a truth to the idea. Since our ancestors first used rocks as tools, we've known that anything around us can be used as a weapon. But that doesn't make it a valid point. Guns are unique in their place as weapons, for several reasons. They are the single most effective weapon ever made.
To begin with, there are very few objects and machines that are made with lethal intentions. Guns are made and designed to kill. Any other use is really an emulation or extension of that purpose. Most other weapons are made from re-purposing objects that already exist for other reasons.
There are weapons which you could use to do more damage and kill more people. Explosives are easy to make, if you understand chemistry. They do a lot of damage and can easily kill a large number of people. But explosives have to be made and stored, which is not easy depending on what kind a person chooses to use. They also need specific conditions to be set off properly. They're more effective when they are placed with a plan and intention in mind. A gun doesn't require a plan or intention. Once loaded, it is lethal. It can be adjusted easily and quickly to accommodate changes in the situation.
A motor vehicle of some kind is also fairly destructive. Tapping someone with your bumper is assault with a deadly weapon, if they're inclined to press charges. But anyone who has had trouble parallel parking knows that cars aren't exactly the most precise tool. And this problem becomes more extensive with the more power that you put into it. It should also be noted that a vehicle is easy to disable. You need only puncture the tires or damage one of a number of systems that sustain the motor.
So we know that to go bigger than a gun, the weapons are less precise. So what about becoming less sophisticated? We could stab or bludgeon our intended victims. And any object will do to this extent, as long as we can pick it up. However, there are two facts that set these kinds of weapons apart from guns.
Bludgeoning or stabbing someone requires more effort than simply shooting them. Vital organs, such as the heart, lungs, and brain, are all protected by bone and cartilage, with very few weak points. To actually kill a person, one has to generate enough force to bypass or break those protective structures. In a gun, this force comes from the explosive force of the gun powder, but with other weapons, it comes from the physical effort of the wielder. It takes less energy and exertion to kill with a gun than with alternative weapons.
Bludgeoning and stabbing are considered intimate crimes. The reason is that you have to be up close and personal to do it. You have to see, hear, feel and even smell your victim as you kill them. You will likely get their blood on you. Killing with a gun can be done at a distance, is in fact more effective at a distance. You don't have to acknowledge that your victim is human, or alive.
There is one last factor that needs to be addressed. It's not about guns themselves but about human nature. Whenever a mass killing of any kind happens we also bring up and discuss mental illness. Now, believe me, mental illness is always a worth while discussion when we bring up making the world a better place. The problem is, how many mass murderers have a history or a predisposition to mental illness?
Every day, we are all subject to forces and situations that cloud our judgment and cause us to engage in erratic, irrational behavior. Anger, stress, depression, paranoia, desperation None of us are immune. To think otherwise is arrogance at best, narcissism at worst. Not everyone will snap. Most people don't. It is entirely wrong to assume that the people who turn to mass murder are somehow insane or deficient. Even the best of us have the furthest to fall. And if we do, we will reach for the most powerful, efficient means to reach our ends. If our intentions are violent, that means a gun.
We've all seen it and heard it. It comes in so many different forms and ways, but it really boils down to the same argument. It is the idea that guns don't need special laws to address their use simply because anything can be made into a weapon. There is a truth to the idea. Since our ancestors first used rocks as tools, we've known that anything around us can be used as a weapon. But that doesn't make it a valid point. Guns are unique in their place as weapons, for several reasons. They are the single most effective weapon ever made.
To begin with, there are very few objects and machines that are made with lethal intentions. Guns are made and designed to kill. Any other use is really an emulation or extension of that purpose. Most other weapons are made from re-purposing objects that already exist for other reasons.
There are weapons which you could use to do more damage and kill more people. Explosives are easy to make, if you understand chemistry. They do a lot of damage and can easily kill a large number of people. But explosives have to be made and stored, which is not easy depending on what kind a person chooses to use. They also need specific conditions to be set off properly. They're more effective when they are placed with a plan and intention in mind. A gun doesn't require a plan or intention. Once loaded, it is lethal. It can be adjusted easily and quickly to accommodate changes in the situation.
A motor vehicle of some kind is also fairly destructive. Tapping someone with your bumper is assault with a deadly weapon, if they're inclined to press charges. But anyone who has had trouble parallel parking knows that cars aren't exactly the most precise tool. And this problem becomes more extensive with the more power that you put into it. It should also be noted that a vehicle is easy to disable. You need only puncture the tires or damage one of a number of systems that sustain the motor.
So we know that to go bigger than a gun, the weapons are less precise. So what about becoming less sophisticated? We could stab or bludgeon our intended victims. And any object will do to this extent, as long as we can pick it up. However, there are two facts that set these kinds of weapons apart from guns.
Bludgeoning or stabbing someone requires more effort than simply shooting them. Vital organs, such as the heart, lungs, and brain, are all protected by bone and cartilage, with very few weak points. To actually kill a person, one has to generate enough force to bypass or break those protective structures. In a gun, this force comes from the explosive force of the gun powder, but with other weapons, it comes from the physical effort of the wielder. It takes less energy and exertion to kill with a gun than with alternative weapons.
Bludgeoning and stabbing are considered intimate crimes. The reason is that you have to be up close and personal to do it. You have to see, hear, feel and even smell your victim as you kill them. You will likely get their blood on you. Killing with a gun can be done at a distance, is in fact more effective at a distance. You don't have to acknowledge that your victim is human, or alive.
There is one last factor that needs to be addressed. It's not about guns themselves but about human nature. Whenever a mass killing of any kind happens we also bring up and discuss mental illness. Now, believe me, mental illness is always a worth while discussion when we bring up making the world a better place. The problem is, how many mass murderers have a history or a predisposition to mental illness?
Every day, we are all subject to forces and situations that cloud our judgment and cause us to engage in erratic, irrational behavior. Anger, stress, depression, paranoia, desperation None of us are immune. To think otherwise is arrogance at best, narcissism at worst. Not everyone will snap. Most people don't. It is entirely wrong to assume that the people who turn to mass murder are somehow insane or deficient. Even the best of us have the furthest to fall. And if we do, we will reach for the most powerful, efficient means to reach our ends. If our intentions are violent, that means a gun.
Tuesday, January 29, 2013
Ex-Cult Survey
Recently, the Teen Mania Honor Academy issued this survey for Alumni. Though I was not contacted directly, I've decided to participate.
*1. When did you graduate from the internship?
2002
*2. August or January?
January
*3. How many years did you volunteer/work for Teen Mania?
1 (technically I worked a summer there as well, but since this is alumni and it wasn't a full year, I've decided not to count it.)
*4. Are you still in contact with any of your intern classmates?
Yes
There's no room to note that most of my classmates that I'm in touch with are apart of the Recovering Alumni Movement, but in touch is in touch.
*5. Do you still wear your Honor Ring? If no, please explain.
No (please explain)
It doesn't fit. And frankly I find I do not wish to be bound by other people defining what "Honor" is for me. Further, I do not find the actions of TM Honorable, so it would be hypocritical for me to wear a ring from them signifying Honor.
Funny that there's no need for an explanation as to why one still does wear the ring.
6. What has been the hardest challenge you have faced as an Alumnus? (note that this is the first question that isn't required)
Letting go of my inflated ego after a year of hearing how much better I was thane everyone else. Also, learning to expand myself beyond the limitations of faith and knowledge the HA endorses.
*7. Which of the following would serve you as an Alumnus?
An actual, meaning full apology to the people the HA has hurt and pushed aside.
*8. What could we do to improve the Alumni Association?
I would invite members of the Recovering Alumni to actively participate in the Association without being judged for their views. Only when the Association, and Teen Mania as a whole, embraces all Alumni and accepts the dissent of others will there be a fair voice of the past to speak towards the future.
*9. How Connected do you feel to the Honor Academy?
Not really
10. If you did not answer connected or very connected in question 9, please share why.
Being in the Honor Academy is an almost complete disconnect from reality. And those who chose to hold on to the world outside were shunned. I'm better off without that in my life.
*11. Have you participated in any Alumni functions? would you be interested in participating in the Reunion this year?
No. If I attend any kind of Alumni Reunion, it will be with the RA community.
12. how often are you contacted by Teen Mania?
Not really
*13. Are you interested in any of the following volunteer opportunities for Alumni involvement, select all that apply
I am NOT interested in being involved at this time. (You think that if I came back as a GI, they'd let me set up my alter on campus? I'm getting triple moon tapestry with Pentacle in place of the center. Or I could mentor a GI. That would be fun. Especially if I were in Texas where I could talk to them on a regular basis.)
*14. I would be interested in donating to improve the GI programs and housing?
No (because I'm broke and I really don't care)
*15. I would consider giving money to Teen Mania for the following. Please select all that apply.
I am not interested (I wouldn't mind being a paid speaker. does that count?)
16. Have you attended college or university?
0-1 years
17. Did you enjoy your Classed at the Honor Academy?
Other (please specify)
I enjoyed classES (you may want to spell check) while I was there, but it's easy when you're running on minimal sleep and maximum activity. That's called brain washing, by the way.
18. What was your Favorite Class? what classes would you like to have access to as a podcast?
Hmm. The one were we stood around in a circle and practiced making prophecies over each other... no wait, that was Blood 'n' Fire. My bad.
*19. In what ways are you attempting to fulfill the Great Commission?
Sending others (as in someone else can do it)
*20. Are you actively involved in a church or ministry?
Other (please specify)
I am currently preparing a sacred space in my bedroom dedicated the the Goddess, in all her glory. So far, I have a table and Black and White pillars, to symbolize the Yin and Yang. I hope to soon add symbols of Fire, Wind, Water and Earth. I am looking into a Triple Moon tapestry and a wall statuary of the Drawing Down the Moon ritual. I think it will look very nice and encourage me in my spiritual pursuits.
*21. What element of the HA has been the most effective in your growth as a Christian Leader?
Other (please specify)
The fellow interns who were scorned and repressed by leadership for not conforming to their idolatry of the Perfect Christian.
*22. Would you recommend the Honor Academy to others?
No
*23. On a scale of 1-5 (1 being the least, 5 being the greatest) how much of an impact did the Honor Academy have on your life?
4
*24. How did the HA enable you to grow in wisdom?
I learned than titles and endorsements reflect popularity, not character. Thus no leader is worthy of my respect until they have done something to earn it.
*25. How did the Honor Academy enable you to grow in discipline in your life?
I learned that rules and "discipline" don't make you a better person. Just harder and more rigid. Often, more judgmental.
*26. How did the Honor Academy help develop your life vision?
It confused me greatly by telling me that my natural desires and inclinations in ministry were wrong. That if I didn't force myself into the spotlight, I wasn't being a true man of god.
*27. How did the Honor Academy enable you to grow as a leader?
I learned that titles, position and vision are irrelevant. Being a leader is no more and no less than helping people find their own path as you walk yours. Very few genuine leaders in the HA.
28. How did your time at Teen Mania Prepare you for your Professional Career?
I have had absolutely nothing that resembles a "professional career" since I was at the HA. I turned down a perfectly good job because I was so puffed up I thought I was better than that, meant for something more. It was the dumbest thing I ever did.
*30. Are you Proud to be an Alumnus of the Honor Academy?
No (I would have gone with Nope, but it wasn't an option.)
And that was the Ex-Cult Survey.
Saturday, January 19, 2013
Reliance
The other day, a friend of mine posted a question on what would our dream job be. I responded with "I'd like to get a degree in relationship and sex therapy as a Psychologist. But my dream job would be as a housewife for a career driven woman, letting me keep my writing as a hobby without the performance stress of needing it for income."
I was a little miffed when she didn't like it or respond. She was so encouraging to everyone else. Then I found out the reason. On another post she shared how several men had shared wanting to "keep house" as an excuse to play video games all day... I can see the appeal, plush apartment, huge screen TV, 360 or PS3, and inevitable boredom that will lead hearts to stray.
I'm writing this because that's really not what I meant. I'm not writing for her benefit, but for my own. I mean if she offered to bed me, I wouldn't tell her no, provided that I wasn't in a relationship first. This is my vision.
Not a plush apartment in the city. A small house just outside the city. Short driving distance to the city, a huge one, but with lots of acreage. A small garden plot for herbs and vegetables, and a few fruit trees. Dogs, cats, a few sheep to keep the grass trim, also for meat and wool. Hunting, not so much fishing. Tanning hides. Sure the big screen and the game consoles, but not to fill my day.
My real job though begins when She gets home. Not my friend who posted, but the general idea of the woman I would end up with in this scenario. I'll spare you those details, namely because it all depends on who she is and what she wants from me on any given day.
The picture I'm painting is something my sister and I have been talking about for some time. We call it Self-Reliance. A partial unplug from the System that keeps us all enslaved to our jobs. In the modern world we can't disconnect completely. Property taxes and the like. But we can have a richer existence for less money if we just take the time to do some things ourselves. Especially the necessities.
Then there's the fact that I want to raise a family. I don't want the woman I'm with to put her life on hold while we have a child or two. I realize that it would be her body, and she would have to put things on hold for at least a few months during the pregnancies, if we decided to go that route. In the end though, I'd prefer to take care of the children myself and let her pursue her career goals with minimal interference.
I don't want to sponge off a woman for my own leisure. I want to be the support she can rely on in the background so she can have her dreams. That will probably mean having a job of my own, and I accept that. But my friend asked what my dream job would be, not what I was willing to do. I guess a better answer would be to have a woman I could devote myself to and a place full of projects to make her life better and easier behind the scenes... and with what time I can muster to work on my own writing.
Friday, December 28, 2012
Silence Equals Compliance
Some time ago, an acquaintance commented on a photo on Facebook. The picture was of two men embracing and holding a newborn between them on the top, with pictures of children holding the familiar "God Hates Fags" signs from Westboro Baptist Church. The caption was "If you honestly believe that a loving homosexual couple raising a child is more offensive than these lunatics teaching children to do this... Then there might just be some issues you need to sort out."
My acquaintance said "Both are equally offensive, but at opposite extremes. What I find most hateful in this instance is to seek and find one particular example of those who falsely call themselves Christian and use them in a smear campaign against the majority of conscientious and loving Bible believing Christians who have nothing to do with the true Gospel message they are so eager to share."
The comment got two likes.
Here's the problem. To outsiders, no one cares who is and who isn't... whatever. Orthodox, Catholic, or one of the myriad of Protestant and Non-Denominational, to Non-Christians it is in fact all the same thing. Bible Thumpers. The Bible Fred Phelps carries is the same Bible Pat Robertson reads, is the same Bible every Christian reads. Translation, edition, cover, these are all just details and completely inconsequential to those of follow other religions and spiritual paths.
When one particular group begins to speak up about anything, they become the voice of those they associate with, whether they represent the majority or not. The perception becomes that the most vocal is the majority. This is particularly reinforced by the silence of any opposition within the same group of people.
The sad truth is that when you strip away the niceties, political correctness, and flat out doublethink that hangs heavily around Christian religion, the message to homosexuals is absolutely no different than Westboro signs: "God Hates Fags."
It's even right there in my acquaintance's message "Both are equally offensive." On some level, he agrees with the message Westboro Baptist is sending. Homosexuality is "offensive". Is it more polite to say that something is offensive rather than you hate it? Certainly. But lets face it, polite or no, it's the same message. "This should not be."
Do I think that Westboro Baptist (or my acquaintance for that matter) speak for all Christians, everywhere? No. I know that many Christians support gay rights, and I know that many homosexuals are Christians. However, so long as the vocal majority within the Christian community (that is, those presenting the loudest and most public message) continue to claim that their god hates people for who they love, or that some kinds of love are "offensive", Christianity, as a whole, will remain labeled as "homophobic". Christians who are not will be perceived as the exception and not the rule.
The only way to change this perception is to change the vocal majority. Christians who support their gay sisters and brothers should take the time to divorce themselves from the homophobic Christian front by making a stand as Christian Pro-sexuals. They won't silence or drown out the Anti-gay movement, but they can change how outsiders see the Christian faith.
My acquaintance said "Both are equally offensive, but at opposite extremes. What I find most hateful in this instance is to seek and find one particular example of those who falsely call themselves Christian and use them in a smear campaign against the majority of conscientious and loving Bible believing Christians who have nothing to do with the true Gospel message they are so eager to share."
The comment got two likes.
Here's the problem. To outsiders, no one cares who is and who isn't... whatever. Orthodox, Catholic, or one of the myriad of Protestant and Non-Denominational, to Non-Christians it is in fact all the same thing. Bible Thumpers. The Bible Fred Phelps carries is the same Bible Pat Robertson reads, is the same Bible every Christian reads. Translation, edition, cover, these are all just details and completely inconsequential to those of follow other religions and spiritual paths.
When one particular group begins to speak up about anything, they become the voice of those they associate with, whether they represent the majority or not. The perception becomes that the most vocal is the majority. This is particularly reinforced by the silence of any opposition within the same group of people.
The sad truth is that when you strip away the niceties, political correctness, and flat out doublethink that hangs heavily around Christian religion, the message to homosexuals is absolutely no different than Westboro signs: "God Hates Fags."
It's even right there in my acquaintance's message "Both are equally offensive." On some level, he agrees with the message Westboro Baptist is sending. Homosexuality is "offensive". Is it more polite to say that something is offensive rather than you hate it? Certainly. But lets face it, polite or no, it's the same message. "This should not be."
Do I think that Westboro Baptist (or my acquaintance for that matter) speak for all Christians, everywhere? No. I know that many Christians support gay rights, and I know that many homosexuals are Christians. However, so long as the vocal majority within the Christian community (that is, those presenting the loudest and most public message) continue to claim that their god hates people for who they love, or that some kinds of love are "offensive", Christianity, as a whole, will remain labeled as "homophobic". Christians who are not will be perceived as the exception and not the rule.
The only way to change this perception is to change the vocal majority. Christians who support their gay sisters and brothers should take the time to divorce themselves from the homophobic Christian front by making a stand as Christian Pro-sexuals. They won't silence or drown out the Anti-gay movement, but they can change how outsiders see the Christian faith.
Saturday, November 10, 2012
More than a taste (Rated X, at least)
I wrote this for a friend, catering to her particular tastes and fetishes. It won't appeal to everyone, but I felt like sharing.
"Holy fuck, am I horny now."
I turn around and looked at you, a little shocked by the bluntness of your statement. You smile and pull up your shirt, showing me your massive breasts barely hidden in your bra. You pull one of the cups aside, giving me a glance of your pert nipple.
I move over to you quickly and press you to the wall. I pull off your shirt and toss it aside, taking a tit in each hand. I wrap my fingers around the edges of your bra, pulling your cups down. I press my lisp to yours, running my tongue over your lips. I wrap my hands around your boobs massaging them with my fingers, digging my nails into your skin. You offer your tongue to me and I wrap my lips around it, sucking a little.
My fingers move down your breasts, finding your nipples. You reach behind you, releasing your bra, letting it fall to the floor. I move my lips along your jaw and down your neck. As I draw near your pulse, I switch from kisses to nipping, biting harder and hard. I glide my fingers down your breasts, taking your nipples between my thumbs and forefingers, stroking them gently.
My mouth continues move lower. I release one of your breasts to glide my hand down over your hip, then inside your thigh. My wrist lifts your skirt as my fingers seek out your warm sex. I curl my palm over your vulva squeezing gently. I slide my hand up, bringing my fingers over your slit. I add a little pressure to your pussy with my middle finger, as though trying to ease it inside you.
My mouth wanders down your neck, finding your breast. I bite down on the soft flesh up and more center from your nipple. As I do, you grind down on my hand and my finger slips inside your cunt, almost by accident. I add my index finger and massage your clit with my thumb. I move my lips down to your nipple. I trace the outer edge of your areola with the tip of my tongue, then another circle brushing your sensitive nub. I flick the center of your nipple with my tongue, then begin sucking at your tit.
You reach down and unzip my fly, fishing my prick out from my pants. You stroke me off as I finger your twat and suck you boob. We pick up a pattern, moving faster, slower, harder and softer together.
You push me back, keeping hold of my length. I release your breast and pussy as you lead me over to the couch. You lay down, pulling me toward you, inviting me to straddle your chest. You let go as I lay my prick in your cleavage, then you enfold my cock in your tits.
I start slow, moving my dick along your cleavage, back and forth. I build speed as I fuck your full, luscious bosom. I reach down and pinch your nipples, pulling them tight as my sex collides with your chest. Your moaning arouses me more and I fuck harder.
I hold on as long as I can, but my excitement builds and I can feel my body craving release. I smile mischievously and look away. You know I'm not going to warn you. But you also don't have to wait long. Soon my penis pulses between your breasts and my hot ejaculate spreads through your cleavage and over your chest, drops spurting even as far as your face. You lick my cum from your lips and release me.
I pull back, spent for the moment, but you still want more. I get down on the floor as you reposition yourself, sitting up with your feet on the floor and your legs spread wide. You take my hair in either fist and pull me close to your waiting snatch. I fight you, just a little, to run my tongue along your thigh and nip you once or twice. Finally, I nestle my face deep between your legs and draw a line along your slit. I do this again, pushing your labia aside to dip my tongue further inside, but just slightly so.
I use my fingers and open your vulva wide. I run my tongue around the edge of your inner lips , teasing your clit, the running down the center to french kiss your pussy. My tongue slides in, my nose brushing your sensitive pearl. I lick you deep, sucking your love juice, drinking it down.
I slide my tongue in and out, reaching as deep as it will go, followed by ringing it around the rim of your hole. At times I would rise up to lick your button, then dive back down. Your body bucks against my face, grinding your sex against my mouth. I keep with you, and bring you to orgasm.
At this point, I change tactics. I withdraw my tongue and replace it with two of my fingers. I curl them against the roof of your vagina, seeking your g-spot. My lips wrap around your clit and begin sucking as I frig your inner pleasure button. I take my time as you rise once more to climax on my face. I keep going, eating you out until you force me to stop.
I sit back and look up at you, your legs spread with your skirt up around your waist and otherwise naked. I stroke my cock. thinking about plunging it deep inside your hole, but at that moment, a throat clears behind us. We look back at the door to see our lovely host standing next to the door, with one or two other guests peeking in the doorway. She smiles and tells us dinner is ready to be served... that is, if we're done with desert for the moment.
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